Finding a funeral home is not easy, regardless of whether you’ve lost a loved one or are working on pre-planning. The details around the death can make us uneasy, and we often avoid thinking about the topic until it is necessary.

A part of the reason why finding a funeral home is difficult is because most of us do not know that much about funerals. We do not interact with them frequently and are usually grieving when we do. It is smart to take a step back when we can and to think about the information that is needed to make the best decisions.

Here are some of the important questions to ask when choosing a funeral home:

How long have you been in business?

Find out if the funeral home is locally owned and if it is an independent business. A family often owns independent funeral homes, and it may have been in business for generations, which will give you a sense of their commitment to their communities. This is not to say that a national chain cannot provide everything you desire, but if local ownership is important to you, it is important to ask. In numerous cases, chain ownership won’t be apparent because of the appearance of the home, the personnel and the name remain the same.

Do you belong to organizations or associations?

It is important to establish if the funeral home is a part of any organization or association. Two of the more popular networks include the National Funeral Directors Association and Academy of Professional Funeral Service Practice. Both organizations set professional standards and offer continuing education, certification, and training programs.

Are services handled in-house or outsourced to vendors?

You can ask if the funeral services are handled by in-house staff or if they use outside providers. Some funeral homes handle everything, and others do not. It is possible that your costs for some services could increase if the funeral home contracts outside for them.

What kinds of funeral packages do you offer?

A funeral home should offer everything from a basic set of options to an all-inclusive plan, for different prices. Regardless of the options that you choose, all packages will include a fee for professional and overhead services, and it can range from about $1,000 to $3,500 which includes responding to your initial request, consulting with you on arrangements, coordinating with the church and cemetery, and preparation of official documents.

Are my options limited because of my personal beliefs?

All options, such as embalming, viewing, cremation, and burial, should be available to you, including those dictated by your faith or your personal beliefs. Embalming, which is the process of cleaning and preserving the body, is not required by law, though a funeral home may require it if you request a viewing or if burial will not be immediate.

What are the basic costs, and what additional expenses should I expect?

It is best to ask your funeral director for a copy of their General Price List; some funeral homes have this information online. If prices for such things as caskets and urns are not on that list, request a list of those prices as well.

Can I customize the funeral service?

This question is very important when arranging for military services. A funeral home should be able to take care of any requests that you have in terms of memorial services, military honors, funeral services, transportation of family members, obituaries, prayer cards and a lot more. Some arrangements are included, and others will require additional cost. Military honors do not add cost.

What are my payment options?

Find out if the funeral home will work with your insurance company, and if they help with arranging for financial assistance. The funeral home should be able to work with an insurance company regarding existing life insurance policies. In the case of financial need, they can help arrange for accommodations for the least expensive services possible.

Are you or your staff on call 24/7?

For this question, the answer should be yes. The funeral director should be able to outline staff procedures in terms of who comes to remove the body, how long it takes them to arrive after they are called and what you can expect to happen when they get there.

Are you familiar with final expense insurance?

The answer to this question should also be yes, even if the final expense policy that is also known as burial insurance or funeral insurance were not purchased from the funeral home in question. They should be able to outline exactly what happens from the moment that they are notified of a death.

The chances are that no matter what you ask, the funeral direct has answered it before. Understanding your options and aligning those choices with your budget, will keep you from making the mistake of confusing loyalty with the cost. Choosing a more expensive option does not mean you loved the person more. In many cases, it simply means that you were not as informed as you might have been.

Other questions to keep in mind when choosing a funeral home

The main factors to take into consideration when choosing a funeral home are first, your level of comfort. Do you feel like the funeral director understands the type of funeral that you want and is committed to helping you achieve your vision? Second, the goods and services. Does the funeral home offer the goods and/or services that you are interested in purchasing?

Next is the pricing. Does the funeral home offer affordable goods and services? Then, the amenities. Does the funeral home have the type of facilities that you need, such as handicapped bathrooms, a private holding room before service and others? And lastly, the religious and cultural considerations. Does the funeral director understand your religious or cultural needs? Has the funeral home ever prepared a funeral according to your religious or cultural customs?

Your first meeting with a funeral director

Your first meeting with a funeral director can take place in person, either at the funeral home or at your own home, or even over the phone. This meeting is an opportunity for you to ask questions, learn more about the services offered by the funeral home, and get a general sense of what the funeral home in question is like. The funeral director should be courteous, friendly, well-informed, and compassionate. You may have questions and requests, and the funeral director should listen attentively and provide answers.

Personal advocacy when choosing a funeral home

At no point should you feel pressured into making any arrangements that make you feel uncomfortable. While some people may opt for embalming, cosmetology and viewing or wake, others may want a graveside service or a direct cremation; all of these are valid options, and at no point should you feel that the funeral director is pressuring you to add on unwanted services.